Things I’ve learned not to say in the hospital at the very moment of pain and tragedy:
“Everything will be okay.”
“You’re so strong!”
“Pain is what forces you to grow.”
“God has an amazing plan for your life!”
“God is using this for your good.”
“God just wanted another angel in heaven.”
“It could’ve been worse.”
“At least you’re still alive. At least—”
“Cheer up and stay positive!”
“Everything happens for a reason.”
“I understand what you’re going through.”
“Time to pray really hard and read more Bible.”
“God is using this as a wake-up call.”
“Be the change you want to see in the world.”
— and other motivational poster clichés.
Things I’ve learned to say in the hospital at the very moment of pain and tragedy (and even then, not every time):
“I’m sorry.”
“How are you right now?”
“I don’t think it’s wrong to be mad.” (Or scared, or hurt, or sad, or weeping, or uncertain.)
“How can I pray for you?”
“I’m always here.”
Or the best thing: listen.— J.S.